Millisecond judgement

You know what they say – the moment you walk into the room of an interviewer, your opposite has unconciously already made a decision upon seeing you.

Three…two…one…BOOM.  Congratulations, you have now officially been judged.

He/She might think: “Damn, I like your style. I like your look. I like your confident smile. I like your firm handshake. Wow. And..what a positive smile! This is gonna be good!” Aaand you are already boxed in the LIKE drawer. Within – three –  seconds. I swear.

For the rest of the conversation, it’ll be a breeze from here on – your opposite is unconciously now only focussing on the positive; down-sizing the eventual negative things they might notice about you.

Or he/she might think the complete opposite… which also occurs within three seconds.  “What the heck is THAT (meaning you). Oh my god, this is going to be a b-o-r-i-n-g conversation, I knew it! She doesn’t even lock eyes with me!?” From here on, only the negative will be noticed.

Have you tried to watch yourself the first moment you enter a room meeting a new client, an interviewer or a person to network with? The interesting thing I have experienced is…the more I used to focus on coming across as RIGHT the more nervous and fake I became. My smile was unreal, my whole gesture way more forced than usual. My hands nervously massaging my fingers. During the entire conversation I tried to be able to read ANY detail from that person’s face whether they approved of me. Or not.

The funny thing is though, once you walk into the room, the opposite person has not only unconciously made a first decision whether THEY like you or not…you have made a decision about them as well. BOOM.

Realizing that is a big game changer.

Once you do, you start walking in, not focussing on yourself that much anymore but you rather do it with an -“Now let’s SEE what this person is like and got to offer!” – attitude.  And then we are talking! The game is on and you are  the leading lady.

Conclusion: It’s not about “My gawd, they are analysing me.” This little dance is about – I – AM – WATCHING -YOU. Keep talking.

Boom Bitches

 

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What are you doing to minimize self doubt upon meeting an interview partner for the first time? What was your best/worst moment!? Please do share with us.

 

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